Debby Downer: A sobering reality

Not your everyday blog
There comes a turning point in all of our lives when we stop being kids and start being adults. Some cross that line a lot sooner than others. Some are pushed into the role much sooner than they are ready for and, because of that, live lives that are much more mature than they are able to handle. For people in that type of situation, they never want to hear when they may be wrong or headed down a potentially dangerous path.

So, as an onlooker to someone who is careening head first and out-of-control down the wrong path, what do the adults in that person's life do? Do we reign them in and protectively hold them close? Do we set them free to make their own mistakes?

I have been put in an impossible situation that I fear every decision I make is the wrong decision. I pray every night for this situation to resolve itself and work out for the best. I trust that God will make this happen, but like many do, I question why God would have presented the situation in the first place. I know, Kaiti....have faith. Sometimes it's hard. It's hard to give something completely over and trust that it'll work out.

I have alienated someone I love with all of my heart because I was trying to look out for them in a time of need - when they needed responsible adults more than ever. Unfortunately, I don't think this person knows how much I love them because they have been influenced their whole life by someone who distorts the truth to suit their own purpose.

I don't know what to do. I feel so helpless. This situation can go from bad to worse at any moment. It doesn't matter, though. The only way this person will be happy is if their toxic environment stays intact. But that environment is unsafe on so many levels. At what point does one remove themselves from a situation completely and just let whatever will happen do just that?

Flippity doo dah!

Current mood: cold

I haven't posted anything lately because I've been busy with school and some family drama occurring on my side. There's not much more I can say beside that, but please keep my family in your prayers while we try to work through this muddled mess. It seems that I'm the one most caught in the middle and it has placed a lot on my mind. I may get into more on this later, but I'm too mystified to even try to make sense of it now.

On a brighter note...

Life will not be the same in the Lewitt household. After three months of Abby flipping only from her back to her tummy, she has now figured out how to go from the tummy to the back. It has only taken her a week of flip-flopping before she realized that she could continue in the same direction and actually get somewhere. She's quick, too! You can just see the joy in her face knowing that she is mobile.

Lexi has been enjoying her week off from school. This morning I tried to sneak out of the house to go to school and she jumped out of bed begging me to take her with me. Tonight, when the sun set, she got in the mood to turn all the lights off and tell scary stories by the beam of a flashlight. Her story went something like this:

"Once upon a time (all stories begin this way, Mommy) there was a Mommy and a Daddy who were going on vacation. They left their kids with Grandma and Grandpa AND Nana and Papa (Mommy you're supposed to say "oh no!"). "

I say, "Oh no! What happens next?"

Lexi continues, "Their car stops working and Daddy gets out to fix it (You're supposed to say "oh no!")

I say, "Oh no! What happens next?"

Lexi says, "Dad gets hit in the head by a BAT!"

I say, "A bat?!?! Who hit him with a bat?"

She says, "Not a baseball bat, silly, a animal bat!"

I say, "Oh. What happens next?"

She says, "Mommy comes out with bat spray and saves Daddy! The end."

What's cool to me is that she sees the Mommy as the one doing the rescuing instead of the typical damsel in distress. Maybe there's hope yet for our future generations.

Another video...I can't help myself.

Okay, so mine is the one in the front row at the far end. You can't say that she doesn't try. Actually she is doing well except she is missing one crucial step. Turn your sound on and listen to the steps.

Don't get me wrong. I am very proud of her. :-D

A River Runs Through It

Current mood: exhausted

Yesterday was some of the hardest and most steady rain we have had here in awhile. It wouldn't let up and, although it has a french drain for this purpose, our backyard had a river running through it. I had a conversation with a neighbor that went something like this:

Me: "Lovely weather we're having."
Her: "Tell me about it. I'm just waiting on the ark to float by with Noah waving."

That pretty much says it all.

**notice the water gushing from in between the ties of the retaining wall**

Another cute video

New slideshow

Ponies, rakes, and dance
Current mood: busy

For awhile, I've been trying to convince Lexi to get her hair trimmed at the salon. She has been strongly opposed to the idea and from past experience I know that she will not sit still and will be absolutely hysterical if I try to force it. One night when I was talking to her about it she said, "Mommy, can you do it?" I tried my best and it didn't turn out TOO crooked. Well, Sunday night Lexi was being aweful quiet upstairs in her room. Usually this means that she's playing with her My Little Ponies in their castle she got for her birthday. When Stefan checked on her, he called me upstairs. Well, we'll just say that she saw where I got the scissors when I gave her a haircut. I know what you're thinking...she cut her hair. Nope that was me when I was her age - there's a picture of it somewhere. She decided that she was going to be a stylist to her My Little Ponies and scalped three of them.



It was one of those moments when, as a parent, you want to laugh but you can't let them see you do it. We had to punish her by taking away the rest of her ponies for a week. It wasn't because of the ponies. I could care less and if she wants butch ponies...be my guest. We had to punish her for playing with scissors without asking. You would have thought that the world was over. I wanted to give them back because she almost made me believe that the punishment didn't suit the crime, but I didn't.



Stefan felt so bad for her that he took her with him to the local nursery to pick out flowers for the backyard while I worked on a paper and Abby napped. Evidently, he decided that she should have a rake because that would make her feel better about the loss of her ponies since she loves to rake leaves in the backyard. (Sucker!!!) They didn't have the type he wanted so they made a special trip to Home Depot for one. When they came back, Stefan cut the handle to Lexi's size and she was thrilled. I know, you're thinking that she's not being punished. She asks for those stupid ponies everyday so therefore she's still being punished regardless.


Monday, my mother-in-law and I were able to observe in Lexi's ballet/tap class. It was so much fun to watch the girls do what the teacher describes as "interpretive dance." They were adorable when the teacher was doing the arm positions. The teacher would say, "high fifth?" And the girls would stretch their tiny arms over their heads to form ovals and scream at the top of their lungs, "HIGH FIFTH!!!!" This was hysterical to me. Lexi was very distracted by all the people. At one point she came over to me and said that she was nervous. Nervous is her new word and she uses it frequently and MOST of the time in the proper context. By the end of class, though, you could tell that she was becoming used to the attention and relished it in fact.

Afterwards, we all went to McDonalds and Nana came back to the house so Lexi could show her how well she is progressing with her reading which she loved and felt so accomplished when Nana left.

Julius Stealzer

Today has been a very busy day mostly surrounding the task of getting the girls' pictures done. It started at 10 am when I called for an appointment and they gave me a time of 3:20. With that I started preparing for the task with baths for both girls (and me too) and then I had to tackle Lexi's hair. We tried unsuccessfully to curl it, but I didn't have enough time for the curlers to heat up enough. So, we had to straighten it back out.

On the way, we stopped and got tights and shoes for Lexi since I wasn't planning on doing this today. We barely got there in time for our appointment. Am I glad that we went there! These photographers are the best. I was not disappointed in a single pose or shot. It was hard to decided which to pick.

The following are pictures of the pictures. These are for viewing only. No copying.







After getting pictures done we decided to treat Lexi to a tasty treat. Orange Julius was just around the corner so we decided that Orange Julius it is. Lexi (who doesn't care to try many new things) was very apprehensive and wanted her old faithful standby, apple juice. I tried my hardest to convince her to try an Orange Julius knowing full well that she would like it, but she would not budge. She spotted that they had ice cream (because they were also a Dairy Queen) and begged for that until I caved. She and I sat down with her cup of tasty goodness and then she remembered that she doesn't like things that are cold. I looked at the cup and couldn't let it go to waste. I gave her a sip of my Pina Colada Julius and she liked it. But, since it had pineapple and her system doesn't tolerate it, Stefan offered up a taste of his Orange Julius. Lexi loved it and didn't want to give it back. Stefan got stuck with the cup of DQ ice cream. Lexi continued to scarf down the yummy, foamy, concoction until the darn thing was two sips from being done. Poor Stefan, all he got were the last two sips (probably backwash). I love it!!!!

Let's get quizzical

Oh my goodness this week has seriously been a test of my mental strength. I had two pop quizzes on Tuesday neither of which I did well on. I am not exaggerating. I wasn't prepared for either one and my grades reflected such. Since there were quizzes in each class Tuesday you might think that today was safe, right? Wrong! I had an announced quiz in English and another pop quiz in Spanish. Needless to say, I'm glad that the academic week is over for me. Now I just have two papers to write for next week. You can tell that finals are around the bend.

I registered for Spring semester today. I'm taking two classes - Spanish Grammar and Composition as well as Learning Styles, Motivation, and Classroom Management. I'm considering adding another class, but I'll probably talk myself out of it. Yes, I would like to finish soon, but I also don't want my kids to suffer at the expense of my education.

I had a parent-teacher conference with Lexi's teacher on Tuesday. She's doing great as far as material goes, but she's still lagging a bit socially. Part of the reason is that she only wants to play what SHE wants to play. I've talked to her about this plenty of times using the opportunity to reinforce a lesson at school on "what it is to be a good friend." I told her that if she doesn't play what others want to play every once in awhile, then the other children will not want to play with her because they never get to play what THEY want. She understands the concept, but does not put it to practice. Oh well, she knows what she wants and if it doesn't bother her, it shouldn't bother me.

The teacher told me to start Lexi with early readers to expose her to sight words. I chuckled. Lexi and I have been working on sight words that I downloaded from the elementary school's website and I've been reading those early readers with her for almost a year! She has a couple that she can even read on her own. This doesn't surprise me that she is ahead in this area because she has always enjoyed being read to.

Abby is doing good as normal. She is growing like a weed! I've finally figured out how to make her giggle. Her giggles are hers and she reserves them for special occasions. She oos and coos alot, but I'm talking full out giggles. I love it!

Sorry no pictures for this post. I'll try to shoot a few for the next one. Until then....

Church, errands, Santa Claus, and conferences

Church, errands, Santa Claus, and conferences
Current mood: amused

The past couple of days have been super busy. Yesterday we went to church in the morning and Brother Lamb (haha he hates to be called that) kicked off a huge series on anger a much needed series for everyone. He mentioned different types of anger cleverly relating them to weather events - snow storm, thunderstorm, tornado, and hurricane - making the types easy to connect with. I, however, think that everyone has some sort of storm raging inside of them that they're unaware of and I think Gary made us all painfully aware of it. It's funny that he mentions stuff just as events occur in my life that make me think that he is talking directly to me since I just had a couple of episodes (one relating to road rage on 575) but I'm sure that all that were there felt the same way to some degree.

After church, we piled in the trusty SUV and ran errands on 92. With two kids in tow, it took about twice as long as it would have, but I enjoyed spending the time together as a family since Stefan worked Saturday morning painting the floor (a tidious and annoying task) at work. He works so hard and I love him dearly for it. We came home to drop the fruits of our journey, feed the baby, and off we were to see our friends' new home. This home would be my dream if only we could afford it (which we never would be able to) and if it came with a maid. I'm so happy for them and know that they will be so much happier there, but I couldn't help being in a funk feeling like the friendship will never be the same because they used to live just down the street and we have grown used to impromptu meetings in the common area across from our house. The upside though is that they started going to Ridge Stone Church a few weeks ago and plan on continuing so at least we will see them there each week.

From their house, we went to Wal Mart to get some things I've been meaning to get for awhile. Abby was agreeable as always and I felt that Lexi was being well-behaved considering the busy day, but you could tell that her incessant gabbing was wearing on Stefan's nerves. This was funny to me because he doesn't understand what I'm talking about when I say that I feel that I cannot complete a thought in my mind without interruption. He knows now! On the way home Lexi was gabbing to which Stefan said, "Lexi I want you to be quiet until tomorrow." He then turned to me and said, "I'll say the same thing in the morning." I just grinned knowing that he now knows what I deal with everyday of the week.

Today, my mom and I went to Town Center mall. I was in the process of complaining about Christmas decorations being out too soon this year (before Halloween) when we spotted Santa Claus sitting alone in his majestic wonderland. I looked at mom and she looked at me. We both looked at Abby and said "What the heck." I plopped Abby on his lap and had a picture done for her first Christmas just in case Lexi pulls her hysteria again this year and ruins their picture. At least I'll have one of Abby alone for her first although she looked like a deer caught in the headlights.

Tomorrow is the day for scheduled parent-teacher conferences. We'll see how that goes. They scheduled 15 minute blocks, but if the last impromptu conference we had is any indication, I'm sure that won't be enough. Ugh!!!

Currently listening : Look to You By Hillsong United Release date: By 03 May,

In My Daughter's Eyes

In my daughter's eyes I am a hero
I am strong and wise and I know no fear
But the truth is plain to see
She was sent to rescue me
I see who I wanna be
In my daughter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes everyone is equal
Darkness turns to light and the
world is at peace
This miracle God gave to me gives me
strength when I am weak
I find reason to believe
In my daughter's eyes

And when she wraps her hand
around my finger
Oh it puts a smile in my heart
Everything becomes a little clearer
I realize what life is all about

It's hangin' on when your heart
has had enough
It's giving more when you feel like giving up
I've seen the light
It's in my daugter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes I can see the future
A reflection of who I am and what will be
Though she'll grow and someday leave
Maybe raise a family
When I'm gone I hope you see how happy
she made me
For I'll be there
In my daughter's eyes

-Martina McBride

(This song is set to play on my myspace account to accompany the slideshow (which has been updated) unfortunately, I could not post the song on blogger)

I will forever shop AT the Rack

I will forever shop AT the Rack
Current mood: excited

Some people have a goal to be able to shop off the rack. That may be true, but this is about something else. I can safely say that, if I have the choice to, I will forever be loyal to Rack Room Shoes for my footwear needs.

I haven't intended to, but I have been a loyal customer for quite some time. There are three shoe shops in town (Payless, Rack Room, and Famous Footwear) and I realized that on average Rack Room outpriced the competition when it came to the name brand shoes so that is where I would go.

Three months ago, Stefan and I bought shoes there that were buy one get one half off so we each got a pair of New Balance. I'm pretty loyal to New Balance because they hold up well and are one of the only brands that carry wide sizes for women. I've never had a pair wear out. I've always replaced them because they were too dirty or I just felt it was time. Well, I realized two weeks ago that the tongue in my right shoe detached. The only thing holding it in place was the fact that I had a lace going through a loop on the tongue.

I went to Rack Room today because they had a buy one get one half off sale again and I wanted a pair of mules for the winter too. When I went to the cashier to pay, (the same one referred to in a previous post as the one who joked with Lexi during trick-or-treating at Riverstone) I told her about my defective shoes. I showed her the tongue and explained that I wasn't blaiming them because they weren't the ones that stitched them (they were obviously a lemon pair because none of my other New Balance shoes have ever worn out). But, I was trying to see if she would offer up a number or address for New Balance so that I could complain to them. She did not offer such information, but she did offer, however, to...REPLACE my 3 month old shoes!

I couldn't believe it! Without me asking or even expecting anything like this she just offered to replace them. So, now I have three new pairs of shoes for the bargain price of that of 1 1/2 pairs. This girl is the type of person that Clark Howard doesn't think exists - a customer service person who actually enjoys being there to provide service to her customers. Rack Room rocks!!!!!




Okay.....




I have too much time on my hands.

Oh, P.S. Get well wishes go to my father-in-law, Dennis, who is recovering from foot surgery and my niece, Mikayla, who has had a rough couple of weeks first with strep throat and now with pneumonia. Get better soon you two!!